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Love You Forever | Pigs and Piglets
 

Love You Forever

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Posted March 7, 2013 by Patty in Baby Piglets
I Love You Forever

***WARNING: SPOILER ALERT AHEAD!*** I love Robert Munsch books. I grew up loving Rober Munsch books, so I have no f*cking clue how the f*ck I missed out on this gem of a total mind f*ck.

My baby-daddy and I are constantly growing the kid library for our bub, so we made some purchases online. This book got chucked into the mix.

As soon as it arrived, I sat down with my sweet August and started to read. The beginning was fine and sweet. A random mother brings her baby boy home and sings to him:

“I’ll love you forever/I’ll like you for always/As long as I’m living/My baby you’ll be.”

Sweet right? Perfect. So the kid grows into a terror toddler, then it gets weird. The mother crawls across her son’s room at night to sing to him:

“I’ll love you forever/I’ll like you for always/As long as I’m living/My baby you’ll be.”

I had to stop reading for a moment because I almost peed myself laughing at this weirdo stalking her son. I mean why crawl on the floor in the middle of the night? Just shout from the rooftops that you friggin’ love your kid and get over it.

I almost stopped reading the book altogether, but I felt like I had to watch this train wreck unfold.

So the kid keeps growing. He’s now nine, doing his own thing. Then, when he’s really, really asleep, here comes psycho mom to hold him and sing:

“I’ll love you forever/I’ll like you for always/As long as I’m living/My baby you’ll be.”

She really has no one to blame but herself at this point if her kid wets his bed because she keeps freaking him out with her rocking and singing to him in the middle of the night …

Then he becomes a teenager and of course whenever he’s really, really asleep, mom of the year crawls across the floor and sings:

“I’ll love you forever/I’ll like you for always/As long as I’m living/My baby you’ll be.”

The teenager grows into a man and gets his ass out of the house pronto (I’d guess here, it’s a 100% to get away from all his mother’s crazy rocking and singing at night). BUT HELLS NO! Stalker Mom 2.0 gets into her car, drives miles across town to his house, sneaks into his room by climbing into a window, crawls across the floor and sings:

“I’ll love you forever/I’ll like you for always/As long as I’m living/My baby you’ll be.”

She really had no one to blame here but herself if her man-boy is a total Mama’s boy.

Dare I continue to read? I turn the page and all of a sudden I got kicked in the balls. HARD. Super mom is too ill to sing to her son, so her son goes to her, picks her up in his arms and sings to her:

“I’ll love you forever/I’ll like you for always/As long as I’m living/My Mommy you’ll be.”

My heart jumped into my throat and suddenly my eyes welled up with huge tears. NO! SHE CAN’T DIE! SHE. JUST. CAN’T. Then the son goes into his newborn daughter’s room to sing:

“I’ll love you forever/I’ll like you for always/As long as I’m living/My baby you’ll be.”

The end. W. T. F!

I can’t even talk about this book anymore without balling my eyes out. Plus I’ve now made it a habit to go into my kid’s room at night and sing to him:

“I’ll love you forever/I’ll like you for always/As long as I’m living/My baby you’ll be.”

My copy of this book is drenched in mommy tears, so you’ll just have to go and get your own.

 


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Patty


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